Friday, May 17, 2013

Great Zimbabwe

Great Zimbabwe, with its enclosures made of stones without any type of cement, embracing the rocky landscape, its stone hills and kopies. I am not going to jump into the heated debate on who build the stone houses that can be found in Zim and Mozambique, whether Phenicians on a mission for King Salomon, the arabs, shonas, lost tribe of Israel, indians or Ananarkis and other aliens of the like. History is always more fun when people really have something to prove, I think. 
For me it is just really inspiring, to see those big walls, with perfect alignment of stones, that have withstand 6500 /3400 / 2000/ 600 years (depending on your point of view, but in any case it is not older than 6500, because as every one should know, the creation had not happened then yet).
It is great to be in a place that breath greatness, that show with its buildings, traces of a well organized group, a rich culture and strength. It is the most interesting thing to hear the different theories about it, and realize that a lot of archaeological clues gathered on the site might have been twisted and re-twisted by the ones in the boss' seat. 

It is sad as well, for at the end of the day, there are great stone buildings but little understanding.  

So this is the story I like most. I heard it from an ancient Mozambican women, who was bling and blind but could see. She told me that she heard this tale from her mother, who heard it from hers and so long since the beginning of times. She was levitating in a small smoky bar in the deep African Veld. After some cups of a local fermented brew, she started to speak and trusted me with the story. She told me that she had no children to pass her wisdom, spoke with deep words she weighted with the thousands of year of oral tradition. When she finished. she died with a last but nevertheless horrible cough.

hum,- am clearing my throat- 
A long long time ago, there was a big fuss between the angels. The argument grew nasty and God decided not to intervene in settling the disagreement. He was tired of his last big job, the creation, and needed some amusement and distraction. He knew he had to cut down his staff and get rid of the losers. He was also a big fan of the theory of evolution, and its base stating that only the fittest should survive. One of the group won (the white robe ones). God kicked the losers out of his place, so the fallen angels went on exile, which happen to be on a spinning meteor, and dashed out of space with some key knowledge and wisdom they took from their previous boss. 
The feathered angels thought they got rid of the bad ones and continued having a sinless blast blowing trumpets and organizing the perfect paradise. 
HAHA, they were completely wrong. First because the theory of evolution failed to recognize the power of cooperation and symbioses between species, then because that specific meteor had a boomerang app in, and as an redundant malaria, zoomed past the earth a couple of thousands of years later. By that time the fallen angels, bored to hell on their piece of rock, had to adapt and put the knowledge stolen from God to good use, created TV and produced a show called Star Trek, which inspired them to invent a lot of things among which the machine that can zap you from one place to another. So they did. As soon as they were at a zappable distance from earth, a group of them decided to come. 
And they came with their great skills and technologies on an island they called Atlantis. From there they decided to go and teach the good words of the lost wisdom (referred to as the hidden book) and to push the human good folks into inventing the telly and new episode of Star Trek. 
So, in their flying saucers (they got zapped with the saucers, no incoherence in my story), they roamed the earth, and gave humans the greatest of their knowledge: Building Walls with stones,  without cement, which in itself is a proof of their extra galactic origin. 
Great places have been build where they stopped, in nowadays Egypt, India, central America and... Great Zimbabwe. The indigenous population was very grateful to the aliens and offered them mating partners in order to accelerate the invention of other useful things such as the zap machine, 3-D printers, the perfect expresso machine, flying saucer, universal healthcare, the secret of happiness and the end of stupidity (my story does not stop here). 
Humans were in any case super happy that the fallen angels had started their teachings by the secret of a great stone wall. Very grateful indeed.
The end of the story is not that nice, God got a bit edgy about all that wisdom and knowledge being shared with the descendent of the vegetarian sinner Eve and poor victim of female tricks Adam, so, with style and without any spirit of vengeance, he flooded Atlantis and spread the theory that is to doubt about the fact aliens are among us, or within us should I say, for these sneaky fellows were more than happy to bring some diversity into the genes of the humans they met. 
It was, however, very unfortunate for Europeans, who, at the time, had followed God's plan and invented cement for their castles. They understood that they missed out on the extraterrestrial parties, and grew frustrated about it ever since. 
SO To make it short, Great zim was indeed build by native zimbabwean, under the leadership and direction of inspired aliens, and that is why, when the english, portuguese and dutch people got there, they were unable not to recognize the touch of the fallen angels, and still utterly frustrated about what they missed, had to work very hard to find all the hidden links between them and the constructions. 

That is the story of Great Zimbabwe. Dare to prove me wrong. Am waiting with a smile.

That is my dad having a nap and baby Elena playing with a wasp 
Elena sleeping, Naomi in her princess dress, Charlie playing with her and Oscar far away, running to be the first on the hill.


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